This blog is inspired by an enquiry I received. It includes a lot of useful information that applies to many of my enquiries so I decided to turn it into an information article that covers many of the frequently asked questions I receive.
I hope you will find it useful! It takes the form of an email response…
“My dear Friend,
Thank you for your request for information.
Please find attached information manuals that explain about Mayastar Academy, Maya Magickal, energy healing, attunements, lightworkers as well as the current syllabus and other options available.
Most energy based systems combine very well with Reiki. Some are based on developing connections with light beings to guide your work and your life and others are more structured or vibrationally specific energies you can use alonside Reiki in healing sessions or on their own. Reiki forms a good basis for practicing within because it is structured but as you develop it’s natural to work in a more intuitive way and including new energies is a great way to do this.
The courses you are drawn to are usually the best place to start. If you feel feel guided to them there’s no better start than that. So for someone wanting to develop their energy healing and spiritual development experience I would recommend a variety – including empowerments to connect to higher beings, systems for healing that work well together and systems that are comprehensive and allow you to develop new ways to work.
A popular option is the Avalonian Trilogy which includes the Avalonian Alignment Programme, Star of Avalon Ascension & Avalonian Spectral Activations – incorporating working with meditation, healing, manifesting through the use of symbols, sounds and energy flows. These can be used together or separately but the system is very comprehensive and works with guardian spirits of sacred land/energy. The Avalonian beings are connected with Pleiadians and what we would call Faery or Earth energy Light Beings so it also allows you to build personal connections with the “tribe” so to speak which can help in many ways – providing personal and professional guidance and facilitating development. You can find more information about the Avalonian Trilogy at www.mayastar.net/aap.htm
This would be my personal recommendation too because it encompasses so much.
Based on your Angelic and Faery connections and experience with Usui Reiki as well as courses that combine well with Usui Reiki…I would recommend (in no particular order):
- Lightworker Archangelic Links
- Fairy Lightworker Program
- Magickal Lightworker Program
- Archangelic Flames
- Orb of Life
- Kundalini Reiki
- Ethereal Crystal Healing
- Violet Flame Attunement
- Rainbow Sequence Healing
- Crystal Rose Attunement
- Nature Deva & Fairies
- Magickal Shaman Lightworker
These are detailed on the complete course list page at www.mayastar.net/courses.htm so you can read more about them and see what resonates with you.
You can receive a personalised package discount if you buy 3 or more options: 20% for 3 or more options; 25% for 6 or more options; 30% for 10 or more; 40% for 20 or more. To enrol on a personalised package please email your order to me and I will send a paypal request reflecting the relevant discount so that you can pay online securely by credit or debit card. (Note – a personalised package can include magical options from www.mayamagickal.net and courses from www.mayastar.net).
As an example, were you to select all of the courses recommended above, the fee would normally be £1020 but with the personalised package discount this would be reduced to £700 with the Personalised Package Discount.
When you enrol on courses with Mayastar you will first receive your course manuals, study guides (Book of Inspiration Volumes 1-5), and an instruction email to guide you in the order to read the materials and explain how attunements work, how you receive them and so on. There is also additional information provided on vibrational healing, quantum theory, metaphysics, lightworkers, meditation, multi-dimensional philosophy and much more to give you an overview of where energy healing fits in to the grand scheme of things. This means courses are accessible to people with no previous experience and also provides inspiration to those who do!
Your attunements are set up by me personally and within 7 days of purchase you are sent your certification and confirmation with instructions.
All Mayastar Academy courses are web based and can be taken by people anywhere in the world. Manuals and Study Guides are in PDF format so you can study from your phone, tablet, computer or print them off.
All courses are accredited by the International Natural Healers Association and World Metaphysical Association; who also accredit Mayastar as an established (in 2004) academy and myself as a teacher/spiritual facilitator.
All courses are to Master level and enable the student to pass attunement on. And all courses can be upgraded (with a £20 administration fee) to a diploma. The Diploma certification requires you submit written work to demonstrate experience and understanding of that system.
Support for students is via email and is included as part of my service during and beyond your course.
There is no fixed time for you to call in an attunement once it’s ready. You can take it at your own pace and prepare for your attunements in the way that suits you. Many prefer this flexibility and privacy to the mass attunement options of seminars and other less personal options. Energy work and spiritual development is an intensely personal experience and over time I have ensured this is maintained while still being able to provide professional but tailored support for individual students.
The following website articles & links may also be of assistance:
Info about exchange rates | www.xe.com
How courses work | www.mayastar.net/courseswork.htm
Distance Attunements | www.mayastar.net/attunements.htm
If you have any questions at any time please do not hesitate to contact me.
I look forward to hearing from you and hope to work with you soon.
Enjoying happiness, fulfillment & success in all areas of your life? No exceptions. Achieving your dreams? Manifesting your goals every time without comprise?
It’s a tall order and I am inspired anew so regularly that I think I may write this blog in a number of parts! It’s a huge subject and considering different elements of the overall philosophy can hugely benefit people in truly living a meaningful life. Staying inspired is a big part of ultimate success.
As a witch and energy healing teacher I am often asked about subjects that boil down to be being related to what I am going to blog about so I have considered and studied widely in this area.
I think it’s important to emphasise that to practice magick (real magick) and spellcrafting requires a commitment and dedication to the study and understanding of subjective, objective, internal and external factors involved in any situation. Without that preliminary work, you couldn’t go on create spells at all – let alone ones that work.
An analogy might be – you want to knit a jumper. You know you need wool, needles and a pattern. You get these. A jumper doesn’t manifest itself after you bought them. If you don’t know how to knit or read the pattern you weren’t at a stage of being ready to achieve that.
You are looking at the result as if the ingredients are magickal in and of themselves. When sometimes the most important thing is to enjoy the journey. Know there is work to do. And decide if you want it enough to put that in. If you don’t, you’re just deluding yourself about what you want.
Many people aspire to spiritual gifts but not everyone will be cut out for the one they think they want to choose. But if you are sure of your “destination”, the fact a jumper didn’t magickally create itself spurs you to learn! The idea of being able to make it inspires you. You don’t see any other way. Because it is what you really want. So you study to get yourself into a position where the yarn, needles and pattern are useful to you. This is not a hardship! It’s exciting. Fun. Part of the journey.
Many people gather the ingredients…see this jumper doesn’t make itself. Think in a defeatist way that they have failed. Or externalise it and think he system has failed. “It won’t work. I give up.”
Well, if you choose to see challenges as failures you are doomed to create that reality for yourself!
If you say you have failed and give up I am sure you will manage to fail. It’s what you chose! In this sense we literally create out reality. The emotional blow, the financial cost, the physical stress – all come from your unshakeable assertion that somehow you were a victim. You decide in that way that you can’t change your future too…and so the problem compounds itself.
If instead of this you look at the bigger picture…imagine yourself making or wearing the jumper…imagine yourself knitting as you watch TV in the evening and can see how these are things will make you feel good. They are what you want. Your choice changes your “destination”. Your attitude is liable to be very different! You see you have the ingredients! Excellent! Now you only need the knowhow and skill…you can get them! Fantastic. You take a class, join a club. You practice! You make some scarves and blankets and learn different stitches so you have experience and skill to go with your intention and goal.
It may take time. Maybe years. It will require dedication and practice to prepare for it, begin it and complete it. But if you choose that destination, you WILL undoubtedly realise it. One day you will be in a position to knit that jumper. You know it. You believe it. You don’t even consider failure as an option! You create your reality.
You may use other techniques to support your efforts. Visualisation. Affirmations about yourself to increase focus and self belief. Or magick to resolve your habit of negativity and self sabotage that’s been hindering you in the past.
But even through learning these new supportive techniques you will be acquiring tools and developing a state of mind that is resilient and increases your possibilities of success in all areas if your life.
It’s amazing what a difference to the realisation of your intentions such steps create.
In this Gatsby is a most compelling and inspirational character. He understands the work he needs to do to achieve his goal and sets about it immediately. He lets go of his past or any resistance caused by it in one moment. He becomes unshakeable in his destiny and devotes himself to creating a situation in which he can realise it.
This means he isn’t just Gatsby but truly the Great Gatsby at that point.
You may think the story is a cautionary tale of a narcissist who is so self centred he creates his own world in which he can be who he thinks he should be. Except his motivation for this is love. And all the external superficial storytelling and “self promotion” doesn’t corrupt him. He doesn’t change his personality or motivation. He isn’t swayed by the fact he can have what other people want because his focus remains always on fulfilling his destiny and achieving what he wants.
That’s what makes him Great.
A lesser person would lose that perspective at some stage. A lesser person would give up. A lesser person would become corrupted and allow the world to define them and thereby lose their integrity. This doesn’t happen to Gatsby!
You may think Gatsby is wrong when he believes he can turn back time if you take it as a literal assertion. I see it differently and believe his is absolutely right! If you consider he believes he can change what happens by choosing the course his life will take than if he hadn’t made that choice and given it his all he is asserting his destiny to fail was false and that he knew that he wouldn’t choose it. He would make the decision. He would never waver.
The film (The Great Gatsby) is so inspiring to me that I listen to soundtrack sometimes to remind me of the positive and (in my opinion) accurate belief that life is what you make it. And only you can choose what you make it.
I even picture Leonardo DiCaprio as Gatsby saying “of course you can” whenever his power to achieve his goals is questioned.
I highly recommend the film! And the book. But even if you’re not into that, I recommend the sentiment…
…define your life…and it will never define you. You cannot lose. You cannot be a victim. You cannot fail. Unless you choose to.
I was recently asked this on my FB group page. Answering without sounding so kookie people following the page who hadn’t heard the term might think definition meant answering it quite carefully! Some new age ideas are very old ideas but with new “jargon” or extensions of existing beliefs and ideas not new to all religions but somehow “reframed” out of context so they do come over sounding a bit far fetched!
It’s a criticism I have for the “New Age” in general. Lots of ideas without much basis and without any subjective or objective reasoning behind them…let alone citing sources that have existed for thousands of years that say the same thing in different words. I am also guilty of not citing sources. I have a really good memory (part of my aspergers – high functioning autism). But I draw a blank remembering faces. And apparently names too. When I am reading fiction I notice I almost blank names as I read them! So even if I remember the book…the cover…where I was when I read it etc, I won’t have retained the author’s name. My mind seems to consider names very unimportant which is why most people in my life have nicknames I’ve given them. It’s my weird “name blindness”.
Anyway…back to the topic…in answering the question referring to similar or associated ideas the person was likely to know instead of me rambling on with a lot of new age jargon, I feel I explained the concept well.
As a teacher of energy healing, attunement based spiritual development courses and meditation based courses, I am very aware of ensuring my writing is accessible to people who have no previous experience.
Also, I am not running a cult teaching new words for ideas that promote exclusivity…or fudge the details so people don’t realise they are not being told anything. Those are pet hates of mine.
Also, as a teacher I don’t want to alienate people who hold religious beliefs that may be different to mine. I don’t teach religion and I don’t like it when people dress ideas and philosophies as being facts. We can be as objective in our explanations as possible – but even the best articulated philosophical deductions are open to debate. (I do feel my Autism helps me to communicate higher concepts in a more accessible way because I have to do it so much as my normal life experience. It definitely helps rather than hinders my work!).
I promote freedom and empowerment so I won’t dogmatically preach theories as facts. I know some new age writers do this…but I think real understanding is only available when you digest information for yourself.
I may be hypersensitive to it…aware sometimes that a blog is addressed to people with a prior knowledge…I always try to pitch my writing so it’s useful to people without prior knowledge; defining terms sometimes makes all the difference!
Anyway…enough about my motivations for the way I addressed the question! In my own words, the answer goes something like this…
Some people believe in reincarnation. Some believe some of us had previous lives on other planets or stars perhaps in a different dimension not a physical body, but a life or origin that’s not of this earth and possibly not of this plane (dimension).
People who feel that often refer to themselves as “starseeds”.
For me personally, I think it’s very possible other worlds and types of existance are viable in addition to being a humans on earth with some kind of soul that exists beyond our biological reality.
I also do agree with the concept because as I child I recall feeling “homesick”. My Aspergers may have been part of that; some people also believe some “advanced” spiritual beings choose to reincarnate to help others achieve spiritual wholeness and that High Functioning Autism or some types of epilepsy are a part of that.
That’s not a new idea but the term “starseeded” is a new age term for it. They may also use terms like “earth angels”, “indigos” and “crystal children” etc…depending on the current trend in ideas or new ideas about old ideas!
I do feel I lived somewhere else before I came here as a human. And that it wasn’t like this. And I miss it. I think of it as being “homesick for heaven”. But I don’t claim to understand what it was or where it was. I do feel the work I do now in this life was chosen before I came here. And I feel it will continue when I leave (die). But I don’t have proof of that. It’s just something I feel so strongly it feels more real than real to me. And I have since met other people who also remember the “before life”.
Some people would suggest my feelings are born of delusion…failing to grasp that the Asper brain is not prone to delusion or irrationality; they are experiences more common to people whose beliefs are a reaction to their emotions. Rather than someone whose mind is hyper-rational. Our problems in being understood usually come from our capacity to naturally experience and express our experiences in a far more abstract way than our lower-functioning peers.
This capacity for abstract understand is why many High Functioning Autistics display unusually advanced language skills, may be drawn to mathematics and tend to show greater creativity. Not all share the same special skills or special interests. But I have no doubt that the work I do teaching energy healing and my magickal ‘career’ are advanced by my Aspergers in ways people of a neurotypical function wouldn’t experience. I wouldn’t trade my High Functioning brain for one that didn’t see music, feel colours or understand how to reweave karma (spells) the way I do. My work through www.mayastar.netand www.mayamagickal.net absolutely relies on my mind being as it is!
The long and short of it is some people believe people who are born with Higher Functioning Autism or Epilepsy (I have Temporal Lobe Epilepsy) were “god touched” thousands of years ago. That’s the phrase they would have used here centuries ago. And only relatively recently have the insights, perspectives and non-confirmity of people like me been negatively interpreted as a deficiency or fault.
This is beginning to change. With High Functioning Autistics being head hunted for their unique abilities especially in identifying problems quickly or irregularities in (for example) programming scripts that a Neurotypical wouldn’t be able to do so accurately or quickly.
And of course, the New Age has seen a revival in old spiritual and philosophical understandings that our uniqueness is a gift: an extra abilty not a disability!
If you would like to know more, I recently posted a new Whispering Witch Heart to Heart on this topic at: https://youtu.be/Azev7P4aIYM
First of all – my post has nothing to do with my channel. My channel isn’t about veganism but there is a crossover I suppose because I tend to make vids on what interests me (Energy Healing, psychology and I guess what would come under the the heading “the occult) in the hope of inspiring others. And a bit of music. And a bit about my aspergers and new agey thoughts.
However, while I did my work tonight I had to take a break. I had a critique channel on about the DurianRider long term steroid “use” and +lFreeleethebananagirl advocating it issue. And I wondered what this vegan movement was turning into? So…I ranted…as quiet as a Whispering Witch can…I ranted a whole ASMR style video!
The vid that provoked me (won’t mention who by) was a commentary about a crazy interview. It came up in my recommend list because I do subscribe to some vegan channels.
I watch Dom Bower vids – they’re fun – really good insight on the same interview in fact! Also Best Transformation – fun and inspirational.
For the science bit I recommend NutritionFacts.Org – brilliant annual lectures too.
Now, I am not a vegan…my diet is predominantly plant based vegan but when it’s not, it’s vegetarian. And has been most of my life.
However, even with a primarily vegan diet, I am not a vegan. My conditioner contains lanolin (from sheep’s wool). I also eat honey from time to time. So any semblance to veganism in my life is happenstance!
However, I do agree with people getting educated and making informed choices. I do agree with the healthy lifestyle and ethical issues when it comes to what we eat. Also exercise and self improvement…spiritual and emotional development. These things I consider very important and I think it’s fantastic that we have access to that information now. And can make lifestyle choices based on facts so we can achieve our potential…on all levels.
Anyway, this ever escalating war of the hardcore vegan movement turns people off. It turns me off! It’s people promoting themselves in the best cases – actively putting people off taking the steps for optimal health, happiness or ethical living. The worst of these “youtube celebs” make non vegans think, “No, I wouldn’t want to be one of “them.””
That’s a shame. A wasted opportunity.
So to the good channels…keep up the good work! Your perspective, information and guidance is so essential to counter the nonsense and keep some balance.
I know I said I would never make a video about other peoples’ videos…but this has been a crazy few weeks for YouTube veganism! Unprecedented.
My recommendations are…
+My channel – varied & kookie – relaxing
+Dombower – keeps perspective. +BestTransformation keeps it fun. +NutritionFacts.Org keeps the science bit.
As I said…my channel isn’t a vegan diet or vegan lifestyle one so I am not entering the ring here! Just recommending the channels I think are worth a look!
Anyone who wants to know about the Freelee/DurianRider drama I recommend Dom Bower’s site for an overview because DR has been churning out videos at a crazy pace. You wouldn’t be able to keep up even if you tried!
The cover that proves…yes…#highfunctioningautism doesn’t mean you don’t have emotions!
Song begins at about 6 mins 30…intro poss not a good idea b/c I start crying b4 I finish it! But the 2nd take which runs straight afterwards, was ok.
Not sure about the recording…sang in my natural voicd but sound a bit off key in places and on my bluetooth speaker the backing track sounds too loud for my voice! But it is just me with a speaker playing the backing track and singing at the camera with no edit.
Song is #thebestday by #taylorswift on #asmr #whisperingwitch channel (info on that is in the info in the dropdown below the video)…& I go on to explain why I was moved to tears first time round!
Dedicated to my dad ♡ who died in September. Photo is of me with dad…who wanted me to promo cancer awareness and using #energyhealing (which I teach online through http://www.mayastar.net) and #reiki to assist transition and symptoms even in terminal cases or while someone is in the “active phase of dying).
It can he used to help relax, reduce symptoms in some cases and help smooth the emotional journey…for the patient and those around them if they are receptive. It also helps loved ones to feel they are able to do something to help and that can be important later to reflect on.
At the time this photo was taken dad had only a few months to live. As you can see…he didn’t look like he was dying. Didn’t actually look like he was 67 either! But at this stage he was on #chemo. He had a numb area on his face and gradually that spread. His death came quicker than expected (the younger you are the faster cells replace and the faster some types of tumour can grow).
I’m just uploading my latest Whispering Witch video to my youtube channel. It’s about applications for the Goddess Aradia Spell which is on the current special offer…but I had to end it with a massive THANK YOU to those people who are watching my videos, liking them, giving me feed back and subscribing to the channel at www.youtube.annalouisemay.net
I was really nervous about using this medium because I have Aspergers (a type of higher functioning autism) and sometimes it means, I don’t want to talk. I couldn’t see a way I would be able to make a channel I could use consistently in a way that would be useful. Before my dad died last year, it was something I told him I really needed to do as my business is online and as other networks are become less useful, youtube has gone from strength to strength. I wondered if maybe I might even be able to just use it post up some of my music…but couldn’t see a way of using it that would be particularly useful for my work given my limitations.
Well…the ASMR trend was the answer. And although the channel’s only been running a month, or 3 weeks, it has 45 subscribers. I don’t pay to advertise it or anything – I so share it on my other networks – but to put that in context, my WordPress Blog which I spend a lot more time on, has 30 followers. It does get more views but people don’t tend to subscribe.
Some of the videos I’ve posted have had a much higher number of views than I would have expected. And when I happened upon the ‘analytics’ page on youtube recently I was stunned to find almost 6000 minutes of view time has been racked up in the short time the channel’s been running.
I’ve had good feed back and I’m surprised that I’ve found a niche I can cater to; my style of vlogging is not typical but it’s gone down well – much better than I hoped.
So I post every night. And I will continue to. And thank you sooooo much to those who are already watching my channel…thank you to those who have shared it with other people…thank you for the feedback and thank you for staying tuned. I’m really, really pleased and surprised.
I would be most grateful to anyone who would share this with their friends…anyone who might be interested in my work. I will quote from the ‘blurb’ that comes up in the info area of my blogs and tells you a bit about it…
“Nocturnal Heart to Heart style vlog in ASMR soft speaking format from ALM, the Whispering Witch.
A bit about me, my vlog & the format I use…
I have Aspergers (a type of high functioning autism) means I’m more comfortable using ASMR “whispered conversation”. The mutual increased focus this initiates allows a more intimate communication & natural connection.
My intention is to use whispered conversation to provide a unique & informal style that will be relaxing to watch, pleasant to hear & with subjects accessible to viewers.
PLEASE wear headphones! (straining to hear a computer speaker isn’t relaxing!)
I plan to upload various vids; some may be general or personal updates; others may be more informative, based around my spiritual & magickal work; general chats & reviews. Also, ‘streams of consciousness’…with no fixed ‘subject’.
Please be aware, I have photosensitive epilepsy and when it gets late and I’m winding down, sometimes this affects me so I tend to wear sunglasses indoors – it’s not an attempt to look extremely cool! That’s just a side effect! I’m aware this looks kind of weird to some people but it means I don’t need meds to control seizures so I use what works for me and doesn’t have side effects.
NOTE: Although Whispering is used in ASMR, I use this technique because it is more comfortable for my autism & is a natural part of my night when I’m winding down for bed. More info on my intro vid – https://youtu.be/dNPMSkX5q9I”
If this sounds at all compelling, please tune in and please share the love! XXX
ALM (Mayastar) aka The Whispering Witch
Quick Beauty Tips Blog n’ Vlog!
This totally unfiltered close up is the most make up you’ll see me wear! I just finished a make up tutorial video I promised my sister & this is the result. Putting on make up and giving a commentary makes it take ages but covered the basic things I use…because I don’t ever wear make up that needs reapplying or retouching so I tend to apply it and wipe it off so the residue is sufficient. Means to the untrained eye it’s hard to tell if I have make up on!
Basic info… I’m 43 this year but I use #cremedelamer moisturiser daily and as I’m #nocturnal, sun damage is limited. I do think #cremedelamer has an anti aging effect…but being a #hermit I don’t really get to compare myself to other people my age. I don’t drink. Quit smoking 9 years ago. Vegetarian for years and vegan for much of it and I dance every day. I think exercise is better than any makeup!
Make up I used…#wunderbrow eyebrow gel (not v neat but I was rushing!), #MineralPowder inc light reflecting #LaMer finishing powder. Lush cream eyeshadow & liquid eyeliner. Lush #redlipstick and tinted #lipbalm.
I do tint my eyebrows and eyelashes and #henna my hair fortnightly. Hair kept shiny with #Lush shampoos and conditioners as I avoid any silicone based products and heat styling. My hair hasn’t actually been cut for about 2 years so as you can see…split ends not a problem!
Took two 15 min vids to complete the demo though! Enjoy!
I’ve blogged abt my aspergers…vlogged about my aspergers. And being able to use my High Functioning to do my work and do it in ways that a Neurotypical couldn’t, is a fulfilling experience. Living within my means when it comes to social connection, sensory stimulation (have to be more careful because those thing can trigger seizures – perhaps more now than when I was younger), and managing the additional anxiety (aspies make less oxytocin than neurotypicals – that means we don’t have the same way out of stress – most of us develop strategies for that through experience though so that’s something that’s become much easier with time for me).
But sometimes…one of the most depressing things to hear, is someone saying my brain wiring is a syndrome…is your eye colour a syndrome? Would you feel weird if people said you had been born with curly hair syndrome?
I’m sure you would. I feel the same when people see my autism as separate to me. Or they disregard or judge certain aspects while celebrating others. As if certain parts of me are not really connected. I don’t feel that way in myself…I think perhaps it reflects a limitation of the neurotypical mind that it can’t conceive mine as integrated!
People who know me know the challenges I have worked with – my total recall memory for example…great for learning but a nightmare if something bad happens and you remember it.
For me…the best thing that ever happened to me was my formal diagnosis – it meant I could research it and many more things made sense. Also, when you understand the physiological root of some tendencies it’s far easier to look for useful changes in behaviour or habit that will make life easier.
My routine is vital to my well being for reasons different to those a NT would cite. But if it means I eat healthy, exercise, don’t drink or smoke, meditate regularly etc. These are habits that would probably benefit a lot of people!
My habit of being nocturnal also helps a great deal but it works well for me. Magick (the actual process of Self Realisation – not the card game and not conjuring!), was my special interest from an early age and now that’s a huge advantage in my work (teaching online courses for energy healing, spiritual development & meditation – and doing ritual work to help people).
If it wasn’t for the extraordinary advantages that come as part of my autism, I wouldn’t have the extraordinary life I have now.
So I absolutely in no way shape or form would trade myself as I am for a more “ordinary” version ♡
Unusual mini vid tonight!
I have temporal lobe epilepsy (TLE).
I was referred for brain scans and tests and prescribed drugs after having a few grand mal/tonic clonic seizures. But found out I had many petit mal partial seizures.
They can affect me in different ways but don’t appear seizure like to anyone watching. I lose my ability to understand what I see. Or I lose my short term memory. Mostly. Or those are the ones I notice.
But due to a v negative effect to an SSRI prescribed during a career change ( which clashes with the autistically wired brain and made me insane! Almost literally), in 2009 I saw my neurologist and said I would like to go drug free because of the mid to long term side effects of drug treatment.
He agreed with me…and we had a long conversation about philosophy where he recommended I read 7 years in Tibet and I recommended he read the Bhagavhad Gita (seriously…there is something about aspers that’s refreshing to those who think spiritually or philosophically…I never expect to have a conversation about it but people feel they can talk on a level with me!).
Anyway. I’m tired tonight and worked a long day so I was busy telling my viewers about my henna mix (hair dye), when my TLE struck. It happens when I rush or when I relax. Light, noise and reading can aggravate it. So I take care to minimise risks. I take valerian root and wind down for a few hours before bed. Wear sunglasses in the bedroom etc.
But fluke of flukes, just had one when I was recording. This is interesting to me. I notice my hand goes to my head like it hurts. It doesn’t hurt. It feels like white noise explosion in the brain. But I don’t fall, I don’t slur, I don’t forget what I am saying even though I go off at a tangent. Most importantly, if I hadn’t told the viewers I was having one, you wouldn’t have known.
Which is why until I had a big seizure, no one knew I had epilepsy!
Listening back to it, I do notice I pause between words increasingly before I have the seizure. And in this tired state, I move my head a lot as if focusing my eyes is uncomfortable. Which it is. And which is usually my cue for a Hepburn treatment (oversized sunglasses indoors).
I am going to post this for epilepsy awareness. Epilepsy doesn’t carry the stignma it once did. For some reason people with aspergers are more likely than average to have epilepsy. Also, sometimes people grow in and out of it.
My autism and epilepsy would be considered disabilities by some. I don’t feel that way about them. Some people have stinky feet and cake addictions…far more debilitating! Also allergies…much worse. So I don’t consider my autism or my epilepsy as disability. Some people have bad manners…surely, that’s worse!
So, I am posting this up with the seizure included for people who don’t know about epilepsy (or henna). Not all epilepsy is grand mal seizures with thrashing about and blue lips. And not all petit mal seizures are the same! I can talk when mine happen but usually can’t see!
I could write more…but I don’t want to write a medical journal article. I just thought maybe it would be informative. If I have never seen myself have a partial seizure before, I expect most people haven’t seen me have one. So it’s sort of interesting…but also may help you understand a bit more about epilepsy in general.
Plus…anything about natural beauty products like henna powder and coconut oil are interesting in a whole different way! So there’s something for everyone!
And also, now you know why I wear sunglasses in the house at night. I am of course, that cool! But they serve a function too!